Author Archives: MeRaw

Jul8

Fat toes and gashed elbows

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Monday 8th June

My weekly visit to the practice nurse saw us discussing swollen, fat toes and over-granulation of the skin. Hmmm, doesn’t sound too pretty! My fourth and fifth toe remain puffy and podgy, and are hypersensitive to touch. In between the toes, where it is warm, moist, and constantly under pressure, the friction of rubbing together, and the graft not taking, the skin remains red raw, and the scar tissue keeps on growing (the over-granulation). Bleurrgghh. The nurse says if it wasn’t for the skin graft, she would probably use silver nitrate to get rid of the excessive scar tissue. But, we’ll wait and see what the consultant says on Monday.

I now seem to have two differently sized feet; my left foot appears to be two sizes bigger than my right! Ha ha, not! When can I wear dainty, summer sandals? High heels?

Anyway, about an hour after returning from the surgery, my mum pops round on her way to the beach. She remembers that she came to see me to ask for a plaster for her elbow, as she had fallen up her steps, coming back from the town. It’s only a graze, she says. Upon closer inspection, I realise it is a rather nasty, deep looking gash. Off we go, back down to the surgery for my second visit of the day, to see the same nurse. Lots of local anaesthetic, three stitches, a SteriStrip, gauze dressing, padding, bandage and an arm stocking, and mum is ready to be driven back to our house, by my husband, for a therapeutic cup of tea. No beach today!

Jul5

The long-awaited letter arrives

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Friday 5th July

I received a letter this morning from the consultant plastic surgeon in Exeter for an appointment a week Monday. The letter says it will just be an initial consultation, so I will go along with all sorts of questions . . . . the main one being, if it’s not life-threateningly desperate, could he hold off any surgery (a delayed Sentinel lymph node biopsy procedure), until after the summer holiday ~ do you think that’s cheeky or selfish or foolhardy on my part???? We booked our flights to America way back in January, for a five and a half week road trip.

I’ve been thinking so much about the arrival of this letter, that when I did open it, it made me feel a bit sick/scared/worried. It’s the prospect of not knowing what they might find, plus the actual procedure itself.

A number of fellow melanoma-ites have suggested that not many surgeons carry out a SLNB unless it is done at the same time as the original WLE.

Still, needs must, if that’s what the consultant thinks.

I have just over a week to wait . . . . .

Jul1

Stitches removed ~ ouchy ouch

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Monday 1st July

Down to the surgery this morning to see the practice nurse and yes, the stitches on my back were more than ready to be removed. One long, tidy running stitch with nine loops. It was mighty sore when the last few had to be tugged and pulled out. A little bit of bleeding necessitated another dressing ~ I think my skin had started growing through the thread, and it was becoming too tight, and a bit inflamed.

It certainly felt very different, sitting in the car, being driven home. The tight, bruised, stretched sensation I had, has now gone. It’s still a bit sore, but improvement is surely there.

A bit wary that when I do sit down, or lie on it at night, I have this awful thought that the scar will split open and my insides fall out! Stupid, irrational, I know; but I can’t help it.

BUT, at least I know all of the scar and surrounding tissue that had been cut away is clear of any disease.

Reasons to be cheerful 🙂

My foot seems to be healing well, but there is a raw patch between my toes, where the skin graft didn’t take. I can now though, wear a loose pair of FitFlops, which is way better than the foam and Velcro bootie. However, my foot still is really swollen; the nurse says this is normal, and may take another two or three months to return to normal. Ha! Oh joy! The nurse also had the doctor sign me off for the rest of the term. No school until September. Wow!

Oh, by the way, can anyone tell me where May and June went?

Apart from two lots of major surgery on my foot, skin graft, two slices out of my back, infections, anaesthetics, antibiotics, stitches, crutches, painkillers, compression stocking, Velcro bootee, plaster cast, appointments, CT scan, twice-weekly dressings, nurses, doctors, consultants, plastic surgeons, hospitals. And in between I have lain in bed, or downstairs in the lounge, on the sofa, with my leg elevated.

Recovery and recouperation are slow, I’m an impatient patient, but I’m getting there.

Jun28

Letter from my consultant

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Friday 28th June

Fantastic news!

This morning I received a letter from my consultant dermatologist, (the one I saw right back at the beginning), who has carried out the two excisions on my lower back. The first time round the results came back inconclusive, so a Wider Local Excision was done, twelve days ago.

“I am writing to confirm that the re-excision of the scar site on your right lower back did not show any residual pigment cells, only scar tissue was identified. Please be reassured by this.”

Yay!! A great relief! An unbelievable weight has been lifted. The dark clouds have dissipated somewhat.

The next step will be the lymph node procedure, to be carried out at Exeter ~ still haven’t heard any news of an appointment, yet.

Thinking lots of positive thoughts, as always.

Jun26

My stitches were not removed!

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Wednesday 26th June

Scheduled for a visit to the practice nurse this morning, I managed to convince her that I wasn’t ready for the stitches to be removed from my lower back. Yay! Since the wider local excision ten days ago, I had been in a fair amount of discomfort: a dull, throbbing, bruised sensation, making it difficult to sit or sleep properly.

I had this awful fear that, because it was a much bigger wound than before, the scar hadn’t knitted together properly, and if the sutures were removed, the whole thing would open up! Silly thoughts I know, but I was really concerned. The nurse, sensing my uncertainty and trepidation, agreed to leave the procedure until Monday; exactly two weeks since the operation. Big sigh of relief!

She commented that my left foot was healing well, despite a small area of raw skin, but it did however, appear to be quite swollen still, but that was to be expected, after two bouts of major surgery. I told her I was trying to take short walks, but on returning home, and later on in the evenings, my toes look like a pack of pork sausages! She said I must continue to elevate my foot whenever possible, and also to massage it, to try and reduce pressure.

Returning from a slow, gentle walk around the town, this afternoon, I sit down in the garden, and my husband turns the hose on, cooling and massaging my aching foot! Perfect hydrotherapy!

Jun23

A few kind words

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Sunday 23rd June

Most Sundays we visit our local supermarket to do the weekly shop.

Having paid and about to move out, a lovely lady who works on the tills made a point of stopping me to wish me well. She said that everyday she sees me I’m looking better and better.

Such kind words, spoken with sincerity, totally unexpected, really have the power to uplift the soul.

Jun19

My Left Foot goes for a walk (first time in seven weeks!)

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Wednesday 19th June

Today I go for a walk, yay!

Having spent the last seven weeks at home, or visiting different hospitals and surgeries, I felt it was about blooming time I had some gentle exercise. My left foot was still rather swollen, so going out for a walk necessitates crutches and a speed akin to a tortoise carrying the weekly shopping.

Despite the slow plodding, it was so refreshing to be outdoors. The sky was a beautiful blue, the colourful boats bobbing on the sea in the harbour were straining at their anchor ropes, and the many, many people walking along the front were engaged in all sorts of activities: eating ice-creams, pushing prams, holding hands, conversing, taking photographs.

I had really missed the normality of everyday life and its simple pleasures.

Jun17

Back op #2

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Monday 17th June

It was way back, on 16th April that I first visited the dermatology department of my local hospital. On that day I had a dodgy looking mole on my right lower back removed under local anaesthetic. The results came back as inconclusive, so erring on the side of caution, the surgeon decided I should have a wider local excision. So here I am: not the most awesome way to start your week, but needs must when the professionals make that decision based upon your best interests.

I was first in at 9am; introduced to two nurses, asked whether I minded a student being present, whether I was taking warfarin and if I had pacemaker. The surgeon then arrived and began to put me at ease. I signed the consent forms, and we were good to go.

Having stripped off and climbed aboard the gurney, I could not see what was happening, but I could certainly feel the many sharp jabs of local anaesthetic, (the surgeon had to inject more halfway through as I could feel a little bit too much for my liking!) I was cut open, the scar tissue and surrounds dug out, deep stitches and surface stitches applied, and finally a  dressing gently positioned over the area.

And breathe . . . . And so to the recovery room for a welcome, wobbly-held, cup of tea.

Had a long chat with the ‘nice’ Macmillan nurse, about my left foot ~ I need to be taking it slow, with little bits of exercise and short walks, to help reduce the swelling, and also massaging in Bio Oil or Vaseline, to break down the fibrous collagen in the wound site (really doesn’t feel pleasant doing that at all!) Then she spoke about the possible sequence of events, going to Exeter for the lymph node biopsy procedure. Not pleasant either, but really is the best, and only course of action to take.

Am now in bed, heart is racing from the anaesthetic and tummy wobbly because it was uncomfortable, but thankful another procedure has been given a tick in the box.

Onwards and upwards towards a steady and comfortable recuperation.

Jun14

Follow up appointment

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Friday 14th June

It is now exactly four weeks since I traveled to Plymouth for the second operation on my foot. Painkillers, dressings, infections, antibiotics, appointments, a scan, compression stockings, crutches, silly foam and Velcro shoe/boot have all been a part of my daily life!

Today I went to see my awesome plastic surgeon consultant at Treliske (he was running over an hour late!), but he still took a considerable amount of time talking to me.

He is really pleased with the way the skin graft is taking on the top of my foot. We discussed all the procedures he had undertaken, and being an 8mm tumour, that means I have Stage 2B melanoma, with a five year survival rate of 70% (good odds, or not?)

For now, I must focus on being as healthy and sunsafe as I can. The recouperation process from two lots of major surgery is still ongoing, taking in physical, mental and emotional recovery.

He is referring me on to his friend/colleague at Exeter for Sentinel lymph node biopsy. (“He’s a good bloke!”) and we talked about what might happen. I’ve a feeling the letter may come through pretty soon, as he dictated the request there and then. He really wants to push me to the front of the queue, bypassing time consuming paper-work.

Also during the consultation he spoke of my talking with an oncologist, but was wary of too many specialists each having their own take on the situation, and advising one course of action without communication with the rest of the team! He told me quite vehemently that I am his patient, and he makes the decisions! (I believe he was making reference to the original Macmillan nurse who gave me conflicting, confusing and wrong information: he seems very possessive about his patients.)

We also talked about our proposed summer holiday, and whether it was likely that we could actually go, bearing in mind his request for SLNB for me. He said if the appointment came through for late July/August then I would be a fool not to accept it. I can always book another holiday, but my health and enjoyment of my life comes first.

I left the hospital feeling quite upbeat; lots of information to take in and process, but I know I am being given the best possible care, and that I am truly being so well looked after.

Jun12

My GP called

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Wednesday 12th June

Lying in bed, on a dreary, grey June afternoon, I am roused from a nap by the telephone ringing. It is my doctor whom I originally saw back at Easter time, about my foot.

He wanted a quick catch-up, as he had been absent from the surgery for a while. He understood that I had been through a lot since he last saw me (understatement!!!), and wanted to know how I was doing. As he had the scan results infront of him, he was so pleased that they had come back clear. We talked of my upcoming appointments and surgery, the infections and antibiotics, and also of the lymph node biopsy procedure. He would try to see me tomorrow, when I go to have the wound dressed. He was also concerned that I wasn’t at work, standing up, teaching all day, and would write me out my fourth sick note, for collection tomorrow.

It was great to speak with him, knowing he had taken time out to enquire about my health and well-being. A super caring and concerned GP: so lucky to have him as my doctor.