Friday 22nd May
We have spent much of the day preparing for your fundraiser tomorrow.
And we have so many bittersweet feelings.
We are doing something good in your memory.
But we really wish it was not so.
I wonder what you would have thought?
All this fuss, just for you.
Maybe you would have shied away.
But we feel we need to raise awareness of this awful disease.
We miss you my darling.
The pain is permanent.
Love you forever.
Beautiful son.
Angel baby.
Monday 11th May
So today we go begging. For your fundraiser that we are planning in a couple of week’s time, we have decided to ask local businesses if they will donate items for the raffle. We are going to raise awareness and money for the Testicular Cancer charity, Checkemlads.
In your name, so far, there will be just over £2000 when we receive the retiring collection taken at the church service. Onwards and upwards to a new target ~ £5000 ~ who knows? It may be possible.
It’s very difficult, boldly approaching a shop or restaurant proprietor, and asking something for nothing. Actually, it’s not for nothing, it’s for an immensely worthy cause, and the business will gain positive publicity.
We began quite tentatively, and collected a goody bag from a wonderful Cornish fudge shop, the promise of vouchers for cream teas, a wetsuit, restaurant meals, amazing waffles…….. and we return tomorrow to ask about boat rides around the harbour, ice creams, surf lessons……. anywhere really that could offer us something to add to the supermarkets’ donations of childrens’ bikes, wine, perfume and whiskey. Plus, in the mail this morning, 50 wristbands from the charity came through the letterbox. The list is growing. And it gives me something good to focus upon; to lift our spirits, as both my husband and I have been feeling a bit down.
We tell you our plans this morning whilst standing beside your graveside. I hope you’re going to approve our ideas in memory of you. So many people knew you, and miss you wandering around the town.
We love you and think about you constantly.
Sweet Angel xxxx
To follow our fundraising, check out:
http://www.justgiving.com/FrankRawlings
Friday 8th May
I suppose I’m going to have days like these ~ days when I don’t want to get up, days when I feel miserable, days where I can’t see anything positive, days that have little purpose, days when I miss my son so very much.
And then something happens and completely changes my outlook.
Our local supermarket has a wonderful coffee shop, with super-friendly staff, and is a great place to sit and chat. Frequently, the entrance to the supermarket is manned by people shaking charity tins, for the earthquake in Nepal, the RNLI, the local surf lifesaving group, various cancer charities and the like. So that got me thinking whether I could ‘take over’ the entrance doorways, and have a fundraiser on behalf of my son, not only to collect money, but to raise awareness of Testicular Cancer too. This is quite a taboo cancer, not often shouted about, but kept quietly unspoken. I approached the coffee shop manager initially, who then spoke with the supermarket management. And they were all for it!
The supermarket would be able to donate a couple of children’s bikes, wine, whiskey and perfume, that I could use for a raffle or auction. The coffee shop would be made available for me to use for a cheese and wine evening, when the raffle would be drawn.
We spent almost an hour talking with management, bouncing around ideas, with them saying they would like to do anything they could to help. It was brilliant and made me feel so much more positive.
We also have ideas of asking the local shopkeepers if they could donate items, and whether restaurants and hotels would give vouchers for meals or spa treatments. I think friends and family are going to be spending the next few days going around the town ‘begging’. People could say no, but I’m hoping for generosity from the local community. We shall see! Anyway, it’s given me a bit more of a purpose. Something to get up for in the morning, and try and raise awareness of this awful disease.
And so, after our long ‘business meeting’, we go to visit our son in the cemetery. Despite our lightened mood, we are saddened as we stand close, and talk to him telling him of our plans. Yes, it’s great to raise awareness and money for the charity on his behalf, but we just wish it wasn’t so. It doesn’t seem right that his life was ended so suddenly, especially as he neared the completion of his treatment and we were told he was doing so well, with the tumours reducing in size. Not fair. Not fair at all.
Let’s focus on the positives then. Spreading the word about checking yourself for lumps, getting people to talk openly about testicular cancer, trying somehow, to give special needs children and adults more information about their own health care, and of course raising a ton of money for the charity.
We love you. We wish you were still here. And we’ll continue to raise awareness in your memory.
To the moon and back xxxx
Raindrops and red roses…..
The Journey of My Left Foot (whilst remembering my son) 