Monday 25th April

With Angel wings you now can fly
Up in the clouds is where you lie.

But in my heart is how you’ll stay
I know you’re there every single day.

Memories of you I now recall
Trying to smile and enjoying it all.

Sweet dreams my precious one
Filled with so much joy and fun.

Look down on us, when you can
Because we miss you, little man.

Love you always my beloved son
Thirty years, and forever young.

xxxxxxx

Sunday 24th April

Somewhere, there’s this place
Where I can see, hear and touch you.
A place where I watch you smile
And where I can feel your cuddles.

This place is unseen by others
But we know it’s there, don’t we?
In my dreams, my soul, my heart
All around me, it’s where you are.

This very special, forever place
Where you and I exist together.
For as long as I move and breathe
You are there with me, for all time.

I love you so very much.
I miss you each and every day.
A piece of you is in my heart
And there you will forever stay.

xxxxxxx

Your flowers

The harbour today

Your flowers

Tonight's sky

Deepening colours

Somewhere, you're out there

Saturday 23rd April

Blue skies
An Angel flies.
Sun rise
Some stifled cries.
Big sighs
Tears fall from eyes.

Love you forever and always.
Missing you every single day.
Beloved Angel son.

xxxxxxx

Blue skies in the harbour this afternoon

Low tide

Pink tulips from your auntie

Love you sweetheart

Some photos from our trip to Portugal and Spain.

Friday 22nd April

After a long, long day, we’re safely home. Having awoken at 5:30am, showered, breakfasted, checked out, we walked to the airport terminal, only to realise some twenty minutes later that it was the wrong terminal. Ho hum.
So we find a bus that takes us to where we should be.
And join the queue to the baggage drop, and following that the queue to passport control, and then the queue to the departure gate, until finally we are safely boarded.
A short, smooth flight up the Bay of Biscay, across the North West corner of France, over the Channel Islands, and we’re back in Bristol in a little over two hours after leaving Lisbon.

Before we actually reach home, we drive in to see you.
This is the longest time we’ve been apart from you, and looking after your flowers at your resting place; but my sister, your auntie, has been to see you whilst we’ve been away.

Standing there, in the cool evening drizzle it seems as though nothing has changed, everything’s the same, you’re not here with us, your life ended too soon: we’ve been off on holiday, and you didn’t come with us.

Nothing’s changed.
Everything’s as it was.
Everything’s the same.

But everything has changed.
Nothing is as it was.
Our lives are not the same.

And tears fall.
This is not right.
Life is not fair.

I suppose the emotion of visiting your grave for the first time in fifteen days really affected us more than we thought it would.

We love you.
We miss you so much.
To the moon and back.
Sweet Angel son.

xxxxxxx

Wednesday 6th April

We’re almost ready to go.
The bags are packed,
The paperwork is ready.

Dad has your toothbrush,
And Frankie Angel Bear
Is coming along too.

We’re taking you with us,
Off to Portugal and Spain.
To stay with your brother.

I love you sweetheart,
And you’re safe in my heart
As we go off on our travels.

xxxxxxx

Tuesday 5th April

There’s a smile on my face,
But pain in my heart.
Silent sorrow envelopes me;
You meant so very much.

Constantly missing you,
Forever loving you,
Thinking of you every day.
I’ll find you in my dreams.

Memories pop up,
Out of nowhere.
You’ll never be forgotten,
But I wish you were still here.

You touched our lives
In a myriad of ways.
And it’s those thoughts
That keep us close to you.

Living without you
Is the hardest part.
Everything has changed;
Life will never be the same.

My life continues,
But I think of what was,
And what now
Can never, ever be.

But there is a smile……
Not always, not every day,
But it is there,
When I remember you.

Love you my Angel.
Beloved son.

xxxxxxx

A peaceful morning, standing beside you

Monday 4th April

My son is my Angel,
But I didn’t want it that way,
Didn’t expect it to be like this,
Living with grief day by day.

My son is my Angel,
He’s now looking out for me,
Smiling down from up above,
But here’s where he should be.

My son is my Angel,
My darling, my precious one,
I’ll miss you forever and a day,
My love can never be undone.

My son is my Angel

xxxxxxx

Sunday 3rd April

I miss you.
Every day
Each day.
Today
Tomorrow
The day after that.
Lost without you.

I think of you.
Every day
Each day.
Today
Tomorrow
The day after that.
So many reminders.

I love you.
Every day
Each day.
Today
Tomorrow
The day after that.
To the moon and back.

In my heart.
Every day
Each day.
Today
Tomorrow
The day after that.
With me forever.

Precious Angel son.

xxxxxxx

Sunny beach this afternoon

Holidaymakers at the beach

Your flowers this morning

Saturday 2nd April

“For you, there’ll be no crying
For you, the sun will be shining
‘Cause I feel that when I’m with you
It’s alright
I know it’s right”
               ~ Eva Cassidy

This song by Eva Cassidy was sung so beautifully by an ex-student of mine, at a fantastic wedding we went to today.
It brought tears to my eyes as I listened to the words.
I thought of you.
I miss you so much.
Love you my sweetheart.
Dearest Angel son.

xxxxxxx

Friday 1st April

Missing your footprints in the sand
Walking along, holding your hand.
Jumping the waves, toes in the sea
How I wish you could be here with me.

You, walking to the sea, North Myrtle Beach. August 2014

On the way back from your paddle

Hilton Head, August 2010

North Myrtle Beach, August 2007

Love you, my beach walking Angel
Now with wings, flying so graceful.
Through those clouds way up high
I smile at you, when I look to the sky.

Missing you every day.
Love you forever.
My precious Angel.

xxxxxxx

The beach this afternoon