Daily Archives: June 3, 2015

Now what?


Wednesday 3rd June

“Beautiful Memories

A bouquet of beautiful memories,
Sprayed with a million tears,
Wishing God could have spared you,
If just for a few more years.
We love you, we miss you,
And we are proud to keep
Your dream and vision alive.”

We have been spending the last few mornings giving out raffle prizes to the lucky recipients as they come into the coffee shop at the local supermarket. We are congratulated on the amount of money raised for the testicular cancer charity, Checkemlads, and many have asked when we are holding the next fundraiser, or that we must make it an annual event, as it was so successful.

It’s good because we are raising awareness and money, but so, so sad that it’s all because of you, and your untimely death.

And do you know what? Your oncologist rang me this morning. After eighty three days of silence, since your passing. Our GP had emailed him twice, and twice the reply came back that he would contact the family.
Until this morning.
I have asked for a meeting with him, rather than talk over the phone.
There are still so many unanswered questions.

Visiting your graveside today, we stood in the sunshine and cried.
I know seeing the oncologist won’t bring you back, but he was supposed to be looking after you, curing you, giving you chemotherapy to shrink the tumours.
So what happened?
Why didn’t you make it?
What went wrong?
Will we ever get the answers we want?

My head is full of hurt and anger and negativity.

I love you so dearly.
My heart is broken.

Sleep tight Angel xxxxx