Daily Archives: March 6, 2016

Last photographs



Sunday 6th March

On this date, last year, (it was a Friday), you had your penultimate infusion of chemotherapy. It was a day case appointment, finishing late afternoon.
You were so close to completing the treatment.


Sitting patiently, in the big purple chair, for your penultimate chemotherapy treatment. 6th March 2015

On the way home, it was your choice to stop at a fish and chip restaurant for dinner.
And, you ordered sweet and sour chicken! Now there’s a choice.
You did eat most of it.
For dessert you had a jelly and ice cream sundae. It looked good, but if I remember, you couldn’t finish all of it.

You didn’t look unwell, ill or like someone deteriorating. You weren’t struggling. Yes, you were tired; the chemotherapy treatment made you want to sleep for most of the day.

The last photographs of you: such a happy, contented face.

Who knew you only had barely a week?
And our lives would change forever.

I wish I could turn back time.
I wish things had been different.
I wish I could have done something.
I wish I could have saved you.


Your jelly and ice cream dessert

I am missing you so much.
I remember what was.
I think of what could have been.
I know how close you were to finishing the aggressive treatment regime.
I think of everything you went through, and am so sad that you’re not here now.
You didn’t deserve this.

I’ll love you forever, my dearest, darling Angel son.