Saturday 13th June
Lost. That’s the only way to describe how I’m feeling right now. My life is lost without you; it has no real purpose at the moment.
We did spend time this morning at your graveside, changing all the flowers, brightening up a dull and grey day. At least two aeroplanes could be heard overhead, and we imagined you on-board, off on a sunny, fun holiday. We couldn’t see the planes today though, as the clouds were thick and heavy with misty rain. We talk awhile, and mention the dream that your brother’s girlfriend had, about seeing you. I so wish we could see you know, and hear you laugh and listen to your voice.
I go to close your bedroom curtains tonight, as I always do, and stop a while to look at your bed: the Care Bears and dolphin lying on the pillows and duvet, and I realise you’ll never snuggle there again.
And it makes me so sad. And lost.
Where do we go from here?
How are we to find our way out of this awful situation?
We are lost without you.
We love you forever.
Sweet Angel child xxxx