Feeling sad


Tuesday 7th July

Shake it off. Shake it off.
I need to be more like Taylor.

I really wish I could shake off the dark cloud of depression that is following me around at the moment.

Becoming upset at the slightest thing, thought, sound, image or smell.

And three times today we spoke with different people who expressed their condolences. They said they missed seeing you walking around, that everyone looked out for you, to make sure you were safe. You were known by so many.

And then I got upset again when we visited your brother and his girlfriend after they had both finished work. We chatted over tea, about this and that, and I was just sad. Don’t know what brought it on. Probably thinking about you, which I do a lot.

I just miss you so very much.
Sometimes it really hits me hard, when I realise I won’t hear your voice again, nor see your smiling face, and we won’t be making plans together for the future.

Life doesn’t seem fair or very easy at the moment.

So Miss Swift, I need some help, so that I can feel better about myself and ‘Shake it off’.

Love you and miss you.
My sweet Angel son.

8 responses »

  1. We just got word last week…a dear friend of ours, just 39 years old passed in her sleep. It was a shock. She has (4) boys. (2) are young adults and (2) are 12 and 10 years old. She used to babysit our kids.

    I am very sad, so I can’t imagine the despair a parent feels over losing a child. Give yourself time. It’s okay to grieve.


  2. Many a times I wondered, why people gather when there is a funeral, why people reach out with condolence messages, when we all know reminders don’t serve good purpose especially with a tragedy of this proportion. Then it hit me one day, it is a way of coming together in grief to say ‘You are NOT alone’, and it is a way of tugging out one thorn at a time with reminders, if not done would probably sink deeper and deeper and fester more. So there is going to be a flash back, there is going to be that tug of pain with each of those messages coming, but know that…..it is all with a purpose to heal a wounded heart.
    Give your self time, don’t rush it, and one day I hope to see a post ….. indicative of you coming a long way….
    Hang in there….it’s going to hurt and its okay.

    Liked by 1 person

      • Pleased to be able to reach out. You are braver than most average folks. Give life a chance, another chance. Even if it means having a cup of coffee without the tears, an evening walk when u come back thinking of that little daisy, that little tenacious blade of grass peeping…..I / We know its going to take time…and we are here.


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